jaaaaaaaaaackfrost:

the moon is kind of a creep the sun is polite and leaves when it’s night time meanwhile during the day sometimes you can see the moon just

watching

(Source: jaclcfrost, via outmybrokenjaw)

rnilkbreath:

rnilkbreath:

rnilkbreath:

i was supposed to go to bed an hour ago dont tell my mom

my mom says i have to go to bed now which one of u meaners told

who the fuck changed ‘fuckers’ to ‘meaners’

(via realhousewivesofuganda)

geometricdeathtrap:

metallikato:

generallegendary:

metallikato:

jewelstaites:

how to give a good handjob

• bop it
• pull it
• twist it

• harder
• better
• faster
• stronger 

You pull your left hand in
You pull your left hand out
You pull your left hand in
And you shake it all about!

Cha cha real smooth

none of you ever touch a penis

(via realhousewivesofuganda)

minnatoo:

all the fandoms

all of them should reblog this

what r you talking about i fuckin died

(Source: zack-lee-fair, via alwaysastark)

all i ever say is “ugh” because it can show confusion, lust, disgust and contempt, and that’s pretty much my life 

(Source: lonelywhiteasian, via butterchickenpies)

danielhoe:

IF YOU DIDN’T THINK LORD FARQUAAD FROM SHREK WAS THE CREEPIEST THING YOU’VE EVER SEEN YOU’RE LYING TO YOURSELF

LORD FARQUAAD MORE LIKE LORD WHATTHEFUCKWHYWOULDTHEANIMATORSTHINKTHISISOKAYFORAKIDSMOVIEJESUS

(via butterchickenpies)

thernardier:

“you wanna see my breasts” i say seductively to my boyfriend. i unbutton my shirt to reveal two large, succulent cuts of meat. i am a chicken. why do i have a boyfriend. why am i wearing clothes

(Source: kawhoru, via butterchickenpies)

nageimakoto:

rabioheab:

mom, dad… i’m… i’m white

(via butterchickenpies)

washedoutwithstatic:

1.
2.
3.
4.
5. please

(via imjoiningthedots)

fasterfood:

what if onions make our eyes water because at some point in history onions abused the human race so now as instinct we begin to cry in fear in their presence

(via kilisbowandarrows)